April 26, 2010
Ya-Online-Juegos.com - Parenting Your Parent Or Spouse - The Family Caregiver
Resource Author Francisco R. Higueras
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Trabajar Work From Home is Easy if you know how!
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As you know, most family members don’t expect to become caregivers. When a situation such as a family member suffering a paralyzing stroke, receiving a diagnosis of Parkinson’s, or as it was in my own case, my mom’s diagnosis of Alzheimer’s disease, a family member, usually the spouse or an adult child is suddenly thrust into a totally new role as care provider. Most of us almost immediately go into “fire drill mode” and require lots of information to answer our many questions. Remember, we didn’t ask for (or volunteer for) this job as caregiver, and it can be quite overwhelming at times.
While my own background at the time included a great deal of education and training on numerous issues impacting both boomers and seniors regarding their health, wealth and lifestyles, like you, I wasn’t even close to being fully prepared to deal with the dozens of problems facing my mom and our family as her disease began to affect her life. Nor was I ready for the impact that Mom’s illness would have upon my time, my energy and my life.
As a result of this initially overwhelming experience, which now includes more than five years of overseeing my mother’s safety, trying to assure her a decent quality of life, and being responsible for handling every detail of her day-to-day living, I am committed to helping others get through the first months of becoming a caregiver for a family member.
The first step to passing through these inevitable tests in a way that leads the child effectively in a healthy way is to distinguish between the child’s action and your reaction. You are responsible for your responses. Life really only seems too hard because you are stressing yourself out in an unbalanced effort to establish control.
In writing this article, it is my desire to identify and discuss many of issues that you will face as a family caregiver as you are pushed into the role of parenting your parent or significant other. Future articles will address topics ranging from how to insert yourself into your parent’s life, to how to deal with parental resistance and denial of very real problems, like living alone, driving or personal safety. Other issues I’ll write about will include recognizing when there is a physical problem and understanding the difference between normal aging and illness-related signs and symptoms.
When life feels too hard, it’s time to take it easier, to trust, to let go, to lighten up. Stepping up the pressure on yourself makes you blow up, it does not help your child grow up. You cannot instill better self-control in a child while you are losing yours.
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